Everett True spends some time with Tunabunny's new album for Collapse Board

Seems to me that most music reviewing is simply down to taking a stance and then justifying it.

1. It’s pretentious
“Topics considered include the subversive nature of toys, the desolation of the family, the ungenuinness of being genuine, the decay of conversation, the rise of occultism, and the history of tact” – Minima Moralia (a 1951 text in Critical Theory by Theodor W. Adorno)

Who wants to know about that? I have ‘Boxerbeat’ by JoBoxers on my iTunes. That’s good simple, well-crafted music. It ain’t going to confuse shit out of anyone, lest it to be to ask why that meandering piano instrumental section in the middle goes on for so long. It begins, it middles, it ends. It’s slightly above average Joe Jackson. Joe Jackson looked sharp. He knew how to crease his trousers. Not for him the sprawling wailing catatonia of ‘Hurry Up’, the opening track of Athens GA band Tunabunny’s second album Minima Moralia. He knew when to cross the road and when to stay put. He did not simulate breathless orgasm. Cymbals did not crash wantonly in his songs. Guitars did not jar. He did not run out of steam only to take big gasping gulps of air and start all over again. One track did not fall into another, or even want to. Unless it did. He fucking rocked but he did not confuse his rock, no sirree. And what went triple for Joe went quadruple for his cloth-capped soul fans, JoBoxers. Damn straight.

2. It’s not Coldplay
Fuck, what is wrong with these bands not wanting to be Coldplay – or even (better) being Coldplay. Imagine that: being Coldplay. Wouldn’t your life be one heady gig of waiting in departure lounges and never taking off? Tunabunny. Will. Not. Make. Money. They. Are Not. Serious. Artists. Not In. That. Respect. (Of Bring Boring). They cause me to type with too much punctuation. They think that faking it is not good. How is faking it not good? Poor Thom. They make my trauma hair (the hair that is no long there) whirl around and slap the air like a Jammy Dodger in a six-year-old’s mouth. Where are the structures? THE CENTRE WILL IMPLODE. These bands, they need to learn respect. They should not look to feline behaviour. Feline is not structure. They should all be like Coldplay, good solid wet-eyed dogs.

Read the rest HERE.